3Everyone imagines an ideal birth for their baby, but each birth is unique and often very different than what you envisioned. If the birth does not go exactly as you planned, you may have feelings of disappointment. Here are some steps to overcoming them.
- If you are reading this, you are probably coming to terms with the idea that you are having negative feelings around your birth experience. This is the first step. Allow yourself to recognize these emotions and realize that it is natural to grieve. However, allowing yourself to feel depressed can cause a riff between you and your newborn and delay bonding. Back up and allow yourself the time and space to bond with your baby that you may have missed before, even if that means staying in bed for a week.Breastfeeding releases hormonal stimulation that will automatically improve your well-being. However, just being with baby and looking deep into baby's eyes will begin the process of helping you to heal and feel better. Allow yourself to open up to the loving bond between you two and embrace the warm glow.Talk honestly with your doctor about your birth experience and resulting feelings. You doctor will be able to reassure you that you did the best you possibly could for you and your baby under the circumstances. He will also be able to educate you on exactly what happened and why so you can better understand your birth experience. If you plan to have another child, your doctor can talk to you about things you may want to do differently.Also, talk with your spouse about how you are feeling; don't leave him out. A confidant or a therapist can also be a good way to vent how you are feeling. A good form of self-therapy is to journal your experiences to help process them.Resist the common error of blaming yourself for your experience and instead show yourself forgiveness. Remember, the birth is only the beginning of a long journey you will have with your child.
